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Despite our focus on a “DIY” and very personal wedding aesthetic, there were some amazing people who helped us create this event that we would like to give a post wedding shout out to.

First of all, the GrooveBomb. Andy, you are the BOMB and you made our bachelor party a night to remember. The Groovebomb rents out for parties and events all year (except when its at BurningMan). You should totally check it out for your next landmark birthday blowout.

Next, Owen Carey, who’s beautiful photos are coming soon. I have worked with Owen for almost a decade- he is an extraordinary theatrical and special events photographer. He also does headshots, family portraits and some weddings. If you need a professional photo of you that really looks like you, only better, he’s the guy you want.

Laura Widener (aka PastryGirl), who was the former pastry chef at Higgins and at SouthPark (and who is also an amazing stage manager) made all of the mini cupcakes for the wedding, and she loves creative and unusual flavor combinations. She also does full-on wedding cakes that are extraordinary. I’ve eaten her cakes at at least 6 different weddings and every one has been (almost) too pretty to eat.

Need something tailored and don’t have a friend in Vietnam to give you a helping hand? We really like the service we got at the European Master Tailor. For bespoke suits made here in Portland, we don’t think you can do better than Seyta at Duchess.

And if you are looking for your own fairlyand forest spot to get married, we can’t recommend Horning’s Hideout highly enough. It was beautiful, very reasonable, Bob was GREAT to work with and, as you can see from the pictures, the spot just has tons of great “scope for the imagination.”

Rocks. Oh, the rocks. We got our river rocks for our placecards/favors from these guys, and they were an absolute hoot. They also have a geologist’s wonderland of landscaping rocks, from honest to god thundereggs and petrified wood to all different kinds of slate, shale, etc.

Raspberries came from the “you-pick” place out at Sauvie Island Farms– they were great, just check to see what’s ripe and blooming before you head out there!

Seafood for the Ahi stacks and the butter fish came from the folks at Pacific Seafood Company. Super fresh and really great.

Gales Meadow Farm provided gobs of organic greens and other veggies for the salad, and Rene and Annie are just exactly the kind of local organic farmer folk we felt proud to support.

And the crackers to accompany the cheese “wedding cake” were arranged by Hollyanna’s dad’s partner Robert, who reps for 34 Degrees. I especially love the black pepper ones and the rosemary ones. They paired so well with the Morbier! I don’t think I can ever go back to stupid Carr’s water crackers after my transformative 34 Degrees experience.

Those awesome peacock earrings came from Redux, my favorite accessories place in Portland, right across from the Doug Fir on Burnside.

The wedding rings came from the Titanium Knights (god I love Etsy!)

And last, but by no means least, Flora Bowley, who painted this amazing image of our day:

wedding painting

You can check out some of her other work or contact her about creating a work of art to commemorate your special day at her website.


Caution, wedding porn ahead. So, here’s the story of the wedding as told through the lenses of friends and family. The gorgeous Owen Carey professional pics are still to come- but this will be a great start for all of you who have been begging for pics.

Where to begin….

How about in the ladies lounge?

ladies lounge

Shhhh…. Flora’s taking a nap.

Meanwhile, here’s what the space look liked before we tackled it:

before the beginning

Rehearsing in the field the day before…

Then the preparations began…

There were a few last minute dishes to be done in the stream….

Briana stream washing

Mocha was worn out before the ceremony even started…

Briana mocha napping

kira setting up

Kira helped get the tables laid out…

morgan setting up

Morgan worked on alcohol (his speciality). The bright blue one we found in a cocktail book- it was called Windex, but we called it “Peacocktail.”

setting the table

Each table was put together to have a mix of styles for glasses and dishes and silverware. It ended up looking like this:

Briana cocktail glasses

more more table setting

apothecary and jelly bellies

place setting

shadowy place settings

setting the table

The hurricane glasses of soups made beautiful centerpieces strung out like jewels along the tables. My dad made the tree trunk trivets, and they turned out beautifully!

The ceremony was set up under the tree…

ceremony chairs

When people first arrived, they got to find their rock from the table…

rock table

Briana rock table tall

The rocks were painted by over a dozen of our friends and family. Each one was unique. On the back of the rock were people’s table assignments.

I was in the tent getting ready…

getting ready

…while the cocktail hour was kicking off up under the trees…

Briana peacock napkins

cocktail hour

alyssa and buchino

After about an hour, everyone was feely buzzy and we were finally ready to start the ceremony.

final prep

our wedding party was busy finding their right places in line…

setting the table with mocha

Morgan’s mom Debi and my son Jack got things started by laying the wedding table. Mocha helped.

morgan and the boombox

We had a little fun with the audience by starting with the traditional wedding march and then scratching over to Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes.” Morgan was a trooper and held the boom box up in true Say Anything style.

coming down the aisle

We asked each set of parents to come down the aisle and leave something on the wedding table that symbolized their contribution to our relationship. Here’s Jim and Christina (Morgan’s dad and stepmom) just finishing their bit:

christina and jim at the altar

Our bride and groomspeople filtered down the aisle, each dropping off something for the table…

The wedding table

and ended up looking something like this:





I tiptoed up behind everyone (but we fooled them by having the bridal party look the other way)…

Then the ceremony began…

The ceremony

It was bright! Thus the parasol…


Look how beautiful my sister and my sister-in-law look!

Owen taking pictures

Owen snapped some pictures…

being with each other

We took a moment to be with each other


before the ceremony began, while our community was asked to share their own advice and commitments with us on little cards we had scattered on their seats…

Then we made a commitment to Jack…

vow to jackvows to each other

And to each other…

vows to each other

Then we exchanged rings…

ring ceremony

And then, thanks to the powers “invested” in him by “the internet,” Ben pronounced us husband and wife…

kissing the bride

There may have been some kissing involved….

Afterwards, there was much rejoicing:


twin kiss

With many beautiful people…

Beautiful Holly

zoe and lisa

Beautiful alyssa

the aunts

Beautiful Ileah

Beautiful Troy

Happiest sibs

winking chris and troy

dad and chris

Chris and the worm

And some beautiful critters…

Bernard the groomsman

Flora got started on her painting…

Briana painting in progress

painting in progress

People snuck a peek at what the menu had in store…

russ and the menu

We toasted the day with soups…

toasting with soups

green soup toast

savored ahi mango avocado stacks…

ahi mango avocado stack

(with wonton crisps fried in coconut oil)

Then dived into the main course (although without the pig… poor sad piggy)

Briana main course arrives

Briana head table funny

Briana arts powerhouse table

Briana Steph table

Briana head table digging in

Later there were some toasts….

Toast part one

toast part three

Ileah toast better

holly toast

family toast

And then cupcakes…

Cupcake tower

And more drinking…


Ben shook

sipping cocktails

And then these guys….

Tapwater guys

Got the dancing started…

first dance


Tapwater led a little drum line through the crowd…

drum line

And little by little people trickled away into the night.

Some folks stayed and joined us beside the campfire…


In the morning was the aftermath…

leftover rocks

wil the day after

cheese aftermath

Briana Basket of soups

The aftermath good

The peahens snuck down to the ladies lounge to see what all the fuss was about…

pea hens checking out the ladies lounge

A good time was had by all….


We’re reaching the part of the wedding that is always the hardest phase for me of any project- That two week home stretch. The plans have all been laid, the details decided upon but not executed fully. Normally, this is the part where I get tired of the work that goes into a project, wonder why I thought this or that detail would be worth all the trouble, start wishing I could slink away to the beach for a few weeks and have someone wake me up when it is all over.

When I’m directing a show, that moment is usually the first day of tech. That’s the point at which the 50 unrealistic (but lovely) ideas you had about how the show would look get abandoned in favor of the three you actually have time for. It’s the moment when you start second guessing all that extra time you spent fine tuning act one scene one (since it meant that you never had the chance to really explore the closing scene).

Its the anti-Platonic moment, I guess. The moment when you have to tear all those beautiful ideal images of how it will all look down out of the ether and let them coelesce into lumpy imperfect similes of what you had in mind. It’s the moment before everyone sees what you’ve done where you are sure they are going to cringe, laugh, or check the bottoms of the plates for scratches, and the hems for missed stitches.

Its a survivable moment, of course. What project worth doing would exist without it? But it is a bit…terrifying. And I generally find that sharing the terror makes it feel a bit less….terrible. So, here’s a brief list of the details left to be arranged and my relative fear factor about them:

77 Forks. Still need 77 forks. I think. (Fear: We added a table to the overall count- did I remember to increase the numbers of all the dishes and glassware we would need by 10?)

Brass Cupcake Tower.. The brass cupcake tower still has a tray and a stand that need polishing. The little flower petals that rim the outside of the tray are a real booger to clean (to quote my dad) and I can’t decide if their current state of semi-polish (acheived after hours of diligent rubbing, washing, and polishing) is charmingly antique or disgustingly unfinished. Corrollary fear- I don’t think I got all the silver trays completely polished. And am I SURE I can serve meat on a silver tray?

River Rock Place Cards.
My dad came up with a brilliant idea to turn the river rock place cards into a keepsake favor by modgepodging a quote or a picture onto the back of it. We’ve got the rocks, but I haven’t yet started the project. The fear- I’m not crafty enough to pull this off, and some of the people coming to this wedding are brilliant artists and designers. It would be embarrassing to not live up to their standards.

Tablecloths and Table runners. My mom and I are going to make the table runners today out of some cast off fabric that was gifted to me. Our friends John and Garrett have agreed to loan us some vintage white tablecloths they recently inherited. I haven’t had a chance to pick them up yet. Fear: Will it all end up looking charmingly eclectic but cohesive? or will it look like a thrift store nightmare?

Alcohol. We were smart about the wine- we’ve been collecting it in small batches for months. And we know we’ll have some vodka and gin brought to the wedding from a friend who’s a small batch distiller. But how much? And how much will we need to purchase? And there’s a keg to buy, and what’s that gonna COST? Fear: cranky sober people. Wedding killer extraordinaire.

Other things it has just occured to me I as of yet have no idea how we’ll manage:

  • Getting everything washed and returned after the wedding. Theoretically we’ll be leaving for a quick honeymoon. Who’s going to make sure all the dishes get washed and re-packed? Where will they get washed?
  • Speaking of honeymoon, we still have really no idea if that’s going to be financially feasible at this point.
  • Hair and make up for the wedding party. A bunch of people have asked me about this and I really honest-to-god don’t know. Part of it is that I’m phobic of hair and makeup people (they usually take one look at my hair and start having BIG HAIR fantasies that take hours to undo). Can we afford to have someone truck out there to do our hair and make up that day? Is it ridiculous to try to do it ourselves?
  • The band. Do they know where to go? What time to get there? Do they need to sound check before the wedding starts? Will we have enough outlets? Are we spending too much for them? Can we even afford them??
  • People showing up who didn’t RSVP. The tables are all sorted, the dishes are all counted, but do we need to have back ups in case random people show up who never RSVP’d?
  • The ceremony. We need to talk through the details and make a bit of a script. This is playwrighting. Earnest, sincere, sappy sentimental playwrighting. I fear playwrighting. I fear my wedding will end up an exercise in bad playwrighting. Maybe I should have hired a playwright.
  • Speaking of hiring, should I have hired a choreographer for our first dance?

Alright, see? this is just getting silly. A wedding is not a “show.” Right? It’s a community gathering, with some food and libation to grease the wheels of community merriment. Its dorky and sentimental by definition. Its DIY by design. And that means the edges will be a bit frayed, the wizard will TOTALLY be visible behind the curtain and if nobody falls into a pool (or ges their dress stuck in their underwear) then people get kinda dissapointed. Right? Right???????????

Oh dear. I need to go drown my sorrows in an otter pop.

This is the best wedding invitation I have EVER seen. I am unreasonably depressed that we didn’t think of it.

Christina, Morgan’s Stepmom, took up the challenge of collecting cool salad plates and blue and green glassware for the wedding.

She sent some pics of her progress so far. Check it out:


Aren’t they gorgeous and antiquey and eclectic? Fairy garden party here we come…. Here’s plates:


Morgan and I got a little collecting done of our own recently. We had decided to escape for a weekend to Bend to clear our heads and get some good work done on that all important, often overlooked portion of the wedding: the ceremony.

The drive was beautiful, curving around the small forested towns at the base of mount Hood and then breaking out suddenly into a long looping drive through sage and juniper scrub. We lost the radio pretty quickly, and instead spent the three hours enjoy the sudden dry heat after a long and dripping winter. As we pulled through beautiful downtown Madras Oregon, we spotted this:


So we HAD to stop. I am, after all, the possibility of joy and abundance, and Morgan? He’s the possibility of Love. So, imagine what possibilities we might discover inside the Possibilities thrift store?

Here’s some of the spoils we found:


I just loved these blue and green coffee mugs with the onion domed sugar bowl, and we were able to also pick up a whole bunch of bread baskets for the tables.

Maybe we’ll weave ribbon through them? Or spray a peacock feather applique down the side…fun stuff to think about.

We had an amazing time in Bend. Isn’t it funny how just one night away from home can have all the restorative properties of a week away (if you do it up right?)

When we got to town it was happy hour and we were both peckish so we popped over to the Bend Distillery tasting room and the woman behind the bar was decked out in peacock colored fedora, corset, feather earrings… well. This seemed like a sign from the gods to us.

Morgan asked about the absinthe cocktail on the menu (because he has been doing some work for Integrity spirits repping their absinthe) and our bartender said she couldn’t know if it was any good- she hadn’t been able to drink absinthe since Burning Man! Turns out she was in the Absinthe bar camp that we hung out at several nights in a row- and, she had been to our camp to get her picture taken! In a split second the world shrunk down to a size you could comfortably stir on a swizzle stick.

We sat at the bar and swapped crazy art in the desert stories with her for a few hours until it was time to go home and change for dinner. Her playa name was GO, and she happened to be headed up to Portland the next day for a Thievery Corporation show (a band we LOVE) that neither of us realized was happening. We ended up trying to get tix, but alas, it was sold out.

Dinner was at Blacksmith, a steak house with a little bit of an upscale Texas vibe and a penchant for fiery tableside service (we had the tableside Bacon Spinach salad but skipped the Bananas Foster- we were just tooo full). Our waitress recommended their version of a cheesesteak, which came on a potato truffle puree (YUM) and had Rogue Creamery Red Hawk triple creme cheese melted over the top.

Indescribably delicious.

Over dinner we enjoyed a bottle of Walla Walla red wine that Holly had gifted to us for the trip and talked about how to incorporate all the people we love into the ceremony without putting them on the spot. Some good ideas developed we think. One of which will involve a 1984 era boom box, if we can find one. Heh heh heh.

The drive home the next day was mellow, lovely and quiet. When the forest sprang back up as we rounded the mountain it was a shock at first (all these giant trees! All this water! All those flowers! It just seemed so…extravagant.) then incredibly beautiful. The abundance we live in here in Portland is so easy to take for granted when you are surrounded by it all the time. A little desert scrub and brown horizon line helps to put things into perspective.

And the dish hunt continues! Maybe there are more possibilities in our future…?

Morgan took a bunch of these while he was out there recently. Thought you might get a kick out of seeing them. My gosh its easy to forget how beautiful they really are. And then you see them in the flesh and you get struck once more- how did the universe manage to make such a perfect marriage of elegance and pure nature? Of briliant showiness and perfect camouflage?


Anyway, enjoy.


This one’s an albino peacock butt. Only one shade paler than my butt would be if you could see it. (aren’t you glad you can’t?)


Here he is from the front. You can’t actually see him so well…he’s so white he basicly burns out the lens from the camera phone.


Here’s a cute little woodpile peacock. You think he’s headed to do the chores? Nah. I think he’s headed to have a vodka gimlet.


This one is a hitchhiking peacock, on the road again, just trying to get here by June cause he hears there’s gonna be a great party.

Speaking of, how do you plan to get here? And where do you plan to stay? There’s camping and RV hook ups at Horning’s hideout itself, and we encourage you to come hang out with us for the whole weekend. Camping’s $4 per night per person. Pretty good deal.

If you can come out at least for Saturday night, we’d love it. We’re gonna have a great big pre-wedding party Saturday night. Should be a blast.

If you are the sort that prefers things like temperature control and showers (but an RV is not your style) then we’ve got some rooms reserved at the Holiday Inn nearby and Morgan gets a great Friends and Family discount at any Marriott hotel (cause he works for Marriott). So let us know what you are thinking of doing, accomodation wise, and we’ll get you all sorted out.


That is all.

update: Oh DARN IT ALL. She just checked her calendar and she’s out of town that weekend. WAHHHHHH. But just cause she can’t do my wedding doesn’t mean she can’t do yours! Read on.

I just had a fantastic meeting with my friend Katy Sanford that started out as her doing me a favor about some work stuff and turned into a wonderful way we are going to help each other out, wedding wise.

Who’s Katy? Well, she used to be a member of this really fun local girl band called the Jolenes. That’s her below (the hot redhead):


Katy’s other job (besides being groovalicious) was to book events in this space called Beast House. Holly introduced me to her when Katy needed someone to organize a poetry open mic. Over the course of our time together we did that open mic, a playwright slam and a fingerpainting party. It was all creative, community based stuff (and hugely creatively fulfilling to organize).

I have a finger painting from one of those events hanging on my board above my desk.

Katy has just about the best sense of style ever- a combo of rocker edge and sultry Bridget Bardot glamour. She got married last year and did this very seventies “Love Boat” themed rocker wedding…very crafty (they made a bunch of paper poppies to decorate the boat they got married on), very stylish, very much something to aspire to.

We caught up with each other recently because I need somebody with good bar connections to help me get posters for Storm Large’s show into clubs around town. I found out that she’s not doing the band anymore, the Beast House space is no more and she’s feeling pretty uninspired creatively at the moment.

So we were talking, and it turns out that recently she’s been trying to get more work in her other area of expertise, namely makeup for photo shoots, weddings etc. Her work ranges from super arty/glam to rocker to super subtle, and she has a kit stocked with every product known to man. So I told her, “Hey Katy. You’ve given me so much great work, how about I throw you some work your way?”

So now she’s going to be our “stylist” for the wedding and take care of gilding all our lovely lady lilies…generally making all our brides women look absolutely gorgeous. Maybe like this:


…or, you know, maybe not quite so over the top. But you get the idea.

As we kept talking, Katy mentioned that she’d been thinking of creating a side business in planning “rock n’ roll” weddings for people. Which would be perfect for her. Her job sends her in and out of rock venues all the time, she’s got a lot of event planning experience, knows tons of bands, is really familiar with a lot of non-traditional venues, plus she’s got relationships with a really good cross section of local indie designers – the kind of people you’d love to use but you have no idea where to find them – from Elizabeth Dye at the English Department, to screen printers, djs, accessories makers and etc.

And think about it: wouldn’t you rather work with a wedding planner who looks like this:

than like this?


So, if you know someone who’s engaged right now and looking for some help with rocker/pirate/glam wedding makeup, or wants to put together a whole rock n’ roll wedding (and just doesn’t know where to start), have them drop a line to She’s got the hook up.

And I can’t wait to see what gorgeous plan she’ll create for the girls to look their best.

I have know idea if we can afford it yet (so many decisions still await!)
But I LOVE the idea of these plantable favors and paper goods.

2-12-bucket-of-love_t You take the paper home and plant it and it comes up wildflowers! And once the plot blooms, the flowers come up again and again, eternally renewing (just like we hope our relationship will).
Wow. I am such a sap sometimes. But seriously. How great are these?

We’ve engaged our good friend Flora Bowley, an absolutely amazing painter, to create a commissioned painting for our wedding day. She did this for some other friends, Rachel and Tyson, and the result was absolutely gorgeous.

This is Flora:s1345546648_30108705_3574 (her fiance Lane teaches capuiera and she is an amazing contact improv and yoga practitioner)

Oh. Sorry. Here she is right side up.

And these are some of the amazing pieces she has created.


Her work is abstracted, but heavily based on natural forms. You see a lot of leaves and pods, gorgeous flowers peeking in and out of the depths. Occasionally a word or two surfaces, speaking to the mood of the moment of its creation.


It’s very layered work. Literally. When staring at one of her pieces you get constant glimpses of the painting that lies beneath the painting you are looking at, going back and back, and others nearly completely obscured. Its an endless source of mystery and contemplation.


You can look at more of her work at her website.

For a while, we were “storing” one of Flora’s pieces on our wall while Morgan’s sister Kira was off on a trip, and I’ll never forget the first time that I wandered into the living room to discover Parker (our roommate Holly’s 8 year old son) perched on the edge of the couch just staring at the piece. He’d cock his head slightly when he noticed something new, and I think I watched him for a solid two minutes and he never moved a muscle. He was totally engrossed.

Her work is incredibly special. We can’t wait for you to see it.

Our friends Tyson and Rachel had her come to their wedding and set up a canvas on an easel and paint throughout the wedding. It was so much fun to stop by her little station in the grass and watch the painting take shape, incorporating details of their wedding, including the candles they used and the pair of swans that swam in the lake nearby. After the wedding she took the piece home and completed it before presenting it to them. And now it hangs on their wall in their media room- looking gorgeous and reminding them of their day.

We, along with a group of their friends, contributed to the commission cost of the painting as our wedding gift to Rachel and Tyson and it felt great- contributing to one friend in order to gift another pair of friends a work of art they will cherish throughout their lives.

So, when people started asking us about registries and showers and stuff like that we discovered that we didn’t really want dishes or pots and pans…we’ve arrived at an age where we’ve already collected most of the exact right sort of things that we want for right now.

But we would want something truly unique and special to commemorate our day and our marriage. Something that would grace every home we ever lived in.

So if you would like to contribute to Flora’s commission for our wedding painting, we think that would be lovely. We’ll sort out details for that in a bit.

Either way, we hope you’ll enjoy the opportunity to watch this amazing artist capture our special day in a whole new way.